December 2011
i need to get drunk and go into a cleaning craze because… dayum
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cosmo tip #109
expertcosmotips:
for a special hanukkah treat, bend your mans penis into the star of david. then burn it for eight nights.
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Friend: How do I find you on tumblr?
Me: You don't.
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Quick civics lesson:
dionthesocialist:
Freedom of speech is: the government will never (lol) create a law impugning your right to say whatever you want as long as it doesn’t create an immediate risk of harm for others.
Freedom of speech is not: you can say whatever you want and no one is allowed to get offended or call you out for being a jackass.
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MacGyver Can't Fix His Own Car!
notyourbestday:
Omg, Jack“ O’Neill!!?
cuntea:
atrulygoodheart:
beepbeeprobot:
offbeatorbit:
cuntea:
BYE, EVERYONE
LOL THIS IS REALLY EMBARRASSING.
It’s okay, you guys, no one has cared about Michelle Branch since 2004 and Kelly Clarkson and her “controversial” shirt that says LEGALIZE IT will fade into obscurity soon enough too.
It really bothers me when people dislike others based solely on political differences. I...
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swintons:
pulsifers:
do you ever spend a very long time wondering about the age of some of miyazaki’s characters
because of reasons?
#IS ASHITAKA LEGAL THAT’S ALL I NEED TO KNOW MANG
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someone come stay with me becvause i’m all alone and idk what to do with myself
i need a gdamn cigarette
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I’m home all alone!!
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Ladies & Gentlemen, I give you, the 2012...
Michelle Bachmann: "Don’t misunderstand. I am not here bashing people who are homosexuals, who are lesbians, who are bisexual, who are transgender. We need to have profound compassion for people who are dealing with the very real issue of sexual dysfunction in their life and sexual identity disorders.” (2004)
Ron Paul: "The rate of AIDS infection is on the increase again. From the gay point of view, the reasons seem quite sensible. First, these men don't really see a reason to live past their fifties. They are not married, they have no children, and their lives are centered on new sexual partners... because sex is the center of their lives, they want it to be as pleasurable as possible, which means unprotected sex. Third, they enjoy the attention & pity that comes with being sick." (1995 in a newsletter)
Rick Perry: "I'm not ashamed to admit that I'm a Christian, but you don't need to be in the pew every Sunday to know there's something wrong in this country when gays can serve openly in the military but our kids can't openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school. " (2011 in a campaign ad)
Mitt Romney: "I should tell my story. I'm also unemployed." (2011 while speaking to unemployed people in Florida. Romney's net worth is over $200 million.)
Newt Gingrich: "She's not young enough or pretty enough to be the wife of the President. And besides, she has cancer." (1994, about his first wife)
Rick Santorum: "Is anyone saying same-sex couples can’t love each other? I love my children. I love my friends, my brother. Heck, I even love my mother-in-law. Should we call these relationships marriage, too?" (2008)
Michelle Bachmann: "Carbon dioxide is portrayed as harmful. But there isn't even one study that can be produced that shows that carbon dioxide is a harmful gas." (2009 during a debate)
Mitt Romney: "PETA is not happy that my dog likes fresh air." (2006, when questioned about driving 12 hours with his dog in a cage strapped to the top of his car)
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SPOILERS FOR HAYWIRE
celestialdeth:
WAIT FOR IT WAIT FOR IT IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE SPOILED GO BACK
SERIOUSLY GO BACK IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW
YOU’LL BE SPOILED
TURN BACK ALL YE WHO DON’T WISH TO BE SPOILED
OKAY OKAY OKAY…..??
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MICHAEL FASSBENDER’S CHARACTER DIES.
The boys are going to New Mexico for the rest of the week. I couldn’t get any time off because it was a spur of the moment kind of thing and i didn’t give enough notice. :(
I’ll be all by myself for the rest of this week. Guess i’ll get drunk
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NAACP warns black and Hispanic Americans could... →
khaleesi:
paradiscacorbasi:
ladyhippie:
sati5000:
I’m not sure if it’s amusing or incredibly sad that this headline hasn’t made an appearance in a single one of my American news sources.
I really really wish I had a more articulate response than screams of rage.
Normally this shows up on snopes right before election day — but NAACP is actually taking the threat seriously now.
I am...
My Top 5 Artists (Week Ending 2011-12-18) →